Maintenance Required

Back Story:

We were tent camping with friends.  It rained.  Turns out our old tent isn't waterproof.  We decided to drive home for sleeping, and early this morning Andy and the boys headed back to the campsite to finish packing and get in another few hours of play with our friends while I stayed home with the baby.  
It's Sunday, and technically I was now free to go to church.  I decided to treasure my quiet morning at home, though, and sat with my baby in the swing on my back porch to worship Jesus right here.  

Cover Story:  

We swung in this quiet, slow, perfect-weather morning and soaked in Jesus.  I sang along to Pandora.  I listened to the words.  I listened to the morning around me.  I wrote down lyrics:

"You have called me higher,
You have called me deeper, 
And I will go where You will lead me, Lord..."

"This is my Father's world.
O, let me never forget
That though the wrong seems oft' so strong, 
God is the Ruler yet!
This is my Father's world.
The battle is not done:
Jesus Who died will be satisfied,
And earth and heaven be one!"

"And when before the Throne
I stand in Him complete
'Jesus died my soul to save'
My lips shall still repeat."

As I swang, 
As I sang, 
I looked at this:

It is not fancy.  It is not beautiful.  Usually I look at this and see a reminder of what I don't have--the money to fix everything at once; or that thing I (think I) want, maintenance-free beauty, cleanliness, and simplicity. 

Just now I looked at this and understood a Truth: Jesus impressed on me how much I would miss, how shallow my life would be, if my physical life was "picture-perfect."
   
The physical always, always has a spiritual and sacred counterpart. 

The physical maintenance required to manage my space, and the necessity of prioritizing repairs and improvements, of doing one thing at a time--these things have spiritual significance.  These things are not only necessary, but GOOD.  They are not signs of any sort of lack, but of the wonderful truth that for as long as I live, I am given this privilege:

to keep growing 
to keep changing 
to keep trusting that God 
Who makes all things new
is faithful and just to complete His good work
in me
through me.  

"Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure. Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain."  Philippians 2:12-16

"And when before the Throne
I stand in Him complete
'Jesus died my soul to save'
My lips shall still repeat."

In Him, it will be picture-perfect when I finish this physical race and stand before His sacred throne.

Joy!

The Struggle Is Real

This post isn't going to say anything you haven't heard before.  I know that.  But I feel the need to get it off my chest a little.  

They say to enjoy every minute of the little years, because they're gone in the blink of an eye.  They say the days are long, but the years are short.  They say I'll miss this when it's gone.  

And they're right.  And they're wrong.  There is a lot about the little years that I do enjoy, I do love, I will miss when it's gone.  Heck, I'm already missing the pre-school adventures I used to have with my two older boys, and recognizing that there will be less, and less, and less time to be with them exploring our world.  I got to really enjoy Lem's babyhood, partly because I fully believed it was my last chance for it, and so I savored him.  Turns out I get to savor it all over again, and this time in a brand-new way with my daughter (what a gift she is!).  I really am thankful for the gifts in these little years.  

But on the "regular" days, the ho-hum, chores-at-home kind of days (which there are more of than adventure days)...it is hard.  I think to myself, ok--all you need to get done today is clearing off that desk surface, and some laundry.  And days and days--and days--later, it is still not accomplished.  It's positively maddening.  

And so, despite not even working outside the home, despite a husband who does more than his fair share of housework and kidwork along with his paycheckwork, despite my savoring and enjoying the little years as much as I can--there are things that I wish were different.  Usually, they are surfaces!  (Ha.)  

And then there's this kid, who is almost ALWAYS at the edge (or way beyond) whatever boundary he's given.  So there's that.   

The struggle of the little years is indeed real.  But hey!  The laundry will still be there tomorrow.  They are 100% right about that.

Love Them Both

I often lie awake in the wee hours of the night, desperately wishing for sleep but maddeningly full of thoughts.  Last night, while my own due-any-day daughter thumped with a strange regularity in my belly ("She has hiccups!" I realized), those thoughts centered on the Reproductive Health Act that New York passed this week.  I was a long time falling back to sleep.  

It seems that the awful implications of this law for babies are obvious, so who is it meant to benefit?  Women, right?  

We all know that life begins at conception.  We may not like it, we may deny it, but we can't actually refute it.  For almost every woman, there are signs to indicate the life growing inside before her belly begins to look baby-full, and long before baby's own movements are felt.  It is hard to deny that something substantial is changing inside, but easier to convince ourselves that our decisions affect our own bodies, our own futures, and no one else's.  But by about half-way, not only are we aware of a distinct person inside ourselves, separate, but we become more and more aware of the actual personality growing inside.  

At that point, to choose to end the life is obvious not just to ourselves, but to others.  "She was pregnant; now she is not."

For almost every woman considering abortion, the decision is not easy, peaceful, or considered good.  It is a lesser of evils, perhaps the only perceived option, arrived at out of desperation.  It is a haunting decision.  We may not like that idea, we may deny that idea, but I have never heard of a woman who was not haunted by the consequences of that decision.  

From this perspective, how does legalizing late-term abortion benefit women?  

This new law authorizes non-doctors to perform abortions.  According to the CIA World Factbook of 2015 information, there are FORTY-FOUR NATIONS with lower maternal mortality rates than the United States.  

The maternal mortality rate (MMR) is the annual number of female deaths per 100,000 live births from any cause related to or aggravated by pregnancy or its management (excluding accidental or incidental causes). The MMR includes deaths during pregnancy, childbirth, or within 42 days of termination of pregnancy, irrespective of the duration and site of the pregnancy, for a specified year.

How does the removal of medical safeguards and standards from an already against-nature procedure benefit women? 

This new law removes substantial layers of criminal prosecution from anyone who would act violently against a woman with the intent of causing her to miscarry her baby.  This means that the choice was made BY SOMEONE ELSE, not the woman, to attempt to terminate her pregnancy by actually violent means, no medical safeguards considered.  

How does this change in legislation benefit women?  

These are only three thoughts to think on.  They seem to me to be sufficient evidence that this law is not meant, in fact, to benefit women.  

Separate, but closely related, are pro-life and pro-family issues, such as: 

• Why are adoption options being actively made less available?
• Why are maternity and paternity leaves painfully short, often unpaid, sometimes non-existent?  
• Why are pregnancy prevention or termination medications, devices, and procedures so much more widely covered by insurances than medications, devices, and procedures to enhance the chances of conception for couples facing infertility?

I could go on.  But these seem like sufficient food for thought.  My state is in the news this week, but our culture at large is less and less pro-choice, more and more pro-death.  My heart is so sad.  

For those of us who are pro-life, AND for those of us who are actually pro-choice--as in, make all the viable options really, really obvious and available--let's work together.  Let's actually work to make abortion rare, even unnecessary.  Let's love babies AND their mothers.  

March For Life 2019, Fast-forward